A Brief History of (British) Filk by Rhodri James

Return to: General Notes on British Filk History

From the Decadence PR1 and Programme Book

Once, long long ago (well, 1988 actually) there was an Eastercon, a jolly con, and Follycon's its name.  Er, sorry, bit of a song crept in, pay no attention to it.  Anyway, at this convention were foregathered many people of a filking persuasion, since the committee also contained many people of a filking persuasion and had promised them unheard-of delights such as a filk concert and possibly even a room to filk in of an evening.

The afternoon before the filk concert Aunty Gytha did go unto the aforementioned people of a filking persuasion, and did say unto them "Bleurgh!"  And after they had presented her with tributes of coffee and Cointreau she did have more success in speaking, since she had not slept yet that weekend.  Anyway, she did say unto them "There is a filk workshop, go ye unto it and strive mightily that there might be new entertainments on offer this evening."  And they said "Yes Aunty Gytha," since they were fond of the current configuration of their anatomies.

The aforementioned people of a filking persuasion went unto the workshop as had been foretold to them or else, and they strove mightily and did forge such an entertainment as had never been seen before either in good clean sunlight or under the eldritch chandeliers of the Adelphi Main Hall.  And they did look at one another and did say "We're Gonna Get Lynched".  They did say this so frequently over the next few hours that it became a rallying call unto them, and did acquire a couple of vowels to make the acronym more pronounceable.

So it came to pass that in the Filk Concert, Filker Abraham and the Smilks did take the stage (although they put it back when it was pointed out that it belonged to the hotel), and did do terrible things unto the Smurf Song, which was fair enough since it had it coming.  Amongst these terrible things were many witty and humorous comments concerning prominent filkers and their habits, yea even concerning Aunty Gytha herself.  As the song reached its close and the audience showed their appreciation, it happened that Rafe (for it was he) noted the approach of Aunty Gytha from the wings (no, from the wings man, pay attention!), and being fully aware that We were Gonna Get Lynched he yelled "Run!"  So it was that all the Smilks did leg it off stage, apart from Michael who said "What?"

Then did Gytha, terrible in her wrath and Cointreau (for she had still not had any sleep), exact from Michael a great and mighty penance.  In full view of the audience, he did make a solemn vow to run the first UK Filk Convention;  and all thought this a most great and wonderful undertaking, possibly excepting those who were nobbled to be the committee.  And most of the Smilks were not lynched after all.